Unwritten Rule # 287 and the T-shirt

The  pregnant belly has a strange effect on society. The average passer-by sees it as a personal blog  or social network of some sort. It has become some kind of  unwritten rule in our culture.

Unwritten rule #287

If one sees a pregnant woman in a social setting of any kind, one must approach sed woman and proceed to do the following:

1. Pretend she knows who you are and cares what you think.

2. Preface all comments with, “This probably won’t happen to you, but…” or “Don’t try to be Superwoman…” or “Make sure you get that epidural right away…” If you live in the South you could also use, “Bless your big, fat, pregnant heart…”

3. Vent all pinned up anger, regret, and disappointment concerning your own birth(s) onto sed woman in 60 sec or less.

4. After doing so, walk away and murmur something like, “That woman is one egg shy of a dozen.”

This unwritten rule is why the majority of my work is prior to the birthing day.  My clients face this kind of kamikaze commenting where ever they go and many times it is in the OB’s office.

This unwritten rule is partly why so many women fear birth. All mothers know that if you teach your little boy that he can’t climb trees because it is too hard, too dangerous, and possibly life threatening…he will never climb a tree and after a few generations, the fear of climbing trees will be hard-wired and there will be no tree climbing boys.  A little dramatic I know! And that’s what we have here…a generational, hard-wired fear of birth.

I am considering printing up maternity T-shirts that say:

“Fear not, it will come out.”

“I will survive.”

What would you put on your T-shirt?